Think Love Doesn't Want Me
by Blizzard779
Summary: Kenny and Stan meet up at Kenny's house for a couple of joints to help heal their newfound mutual emotional trauma. Stan see's one of South Parks rarest and real event, Kenny McCormick in an emotional state. Not a Stenny pairing, soz not soz. Just some emotional bro time. One-shot


**Authors Note:** **Well hi there, friends! i decided to write this up because i got bored on the train and i figured fanfiction is better than having ideas just flying out the window. So here's a high session with Stan and Kenny after some emotional happenings. Enjoy!  
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Another puff, another stroke of ecstasy and relief flows through his veins. The smoke thinly veiled the air of the small bed room and filled the lungs of its occupants while 'Scar Tissue' by the Red Hot Chilli Peppers played. Kenny eyed the joint down as if it had infinite wisdom to bestow. Stan just lay on the bean bag, staring into nothing.

The boys using their respected break ups as an excuse to escape into euphoria.

"Dude, how many fuckin amazing things have been invented because of this." Kenny pondered lying on his bed, still staring at the weed. "Like, when will it be my turn. Then I could be a damn millionaire"

"Fucks sake, dude. Wendy broke up with me last week and I'm still depressed, even with all the weed. Bebe broke up with you earlier today, how are you so god damn cheerful?" Stan asked glumly, yet full of intrigue.

"It's the damndest thing, Stan. The exact reason we broke up is I don't show enough of myself." Kenny confessed

"Like, how you love her?" Stan said, straightening up and listening contently. It was rare Kenny talked to him about emotions. Usually, it was just banter and messing around, but nothing deeper than that, not that the boys minded, they were happy with their friendship, but any chance Stan saw that put Kenny into a deeper state of mind, he would take.

"Yeah, but... Nah it'll just ruin this good session." Kenny gloomily stated.

"No!" Stan retorted almost too quickly. He wasn't missing this chance, damnit. It wasn't just Stan; anyone would be dying for this opportunity. To have a one on one talk about emotions with Kenny McCormick. "It's healthy to talk about these things, man. You should let it out" Stan saved himself from his eagerness.

"Well, it's not a matter of showing my own love. I did that, let me tell you. In multiple different ways might I add." He added with a wink, while Stan rolled his eyes. "But a matter of showing anything beyond that. I never showed her how much I actually care or what was annoying me that day or what upset me." Kenny continued.

There was a pause, long enough to be noticeable but not long enough to interrupt. Kenny took another hit before he continued.

"She wanted me to show more personality but apparently I couldn't bring myself to do it. After years of hiding everything I feel and fucking feelings away; i suppose you just get used to not saying anything and going along with what other people want. Let me tell you, that shit doesn't work in a relationship with someone who wants an opinion. Whether it be on an outfit or something to do for a date." Kenny lectured forlornly.

Stan could tell this was hard for Kenny, and that every word that came from his was laced with heartbreak. That he was just adding his smile of 'everything's ok with me!' Even though things clearly weren't, he could tell by Kenny's eyes that he was in hell. They're the same eyes Stan had when Wendy walked out the door on him.

"Things can be unnecessarily difficult most times, man." Stan comforted. He didn't know what else to add. He almost shamed himself; here was one of his best friends, who rarely showed his feelings, hurting. He hated himself for getting high. It ruined most of his train of thought. "If there's something from what I've learned from my week, it doesn't let your own head get the best of you." Consulted Stan, he understood that it was hard to listen to what your own head had to say about yourself and your own failure, if there was something Stan could've used in his day of his break up was a second opinion.

"Yeah..." Kenny sighed. "Just starting to think love doesn't want me. Yet I keep taking it. Well, it should teach me for being a selfish dick. Maybe I'll just let love go, start anew on this whole fucking around thing." Kenny said nonchalantly. Yet Stan was stunned, he made such a good boyfriend, he saw all the things he did for Bebe, from giving up smoking to buying her things with what little money he had. Anyone he asked, they'd say he was a good boyfriend, which led Stan to a question.

"Why did she break up with you, dude?" Stan asked

"I already told you, ass for brains." Kenny spat out, little annoyed his friend wasn't listening.

"Yeah I know, you didn't show her your feelings and stuff, but why?" The room fell into silence, beside Fallout Boy now quietly playing from the radio.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, as a girlfriend, she should work on that. As a girlfriend, she needs to help you talk to her about everything. It's not your fault you bottle things up, it's what you've been doing your whole life, how can she not understand that you aren't just gonna turn that shit around just for her? I mean, I know you'd do anything for her, you're a good honourable guy, when you wanna be, but some things you just need help with, especially the problems you don't even know exist. If she wanted you to be more open, then she should've said. You can't help being you, man. Don't ever change yourself for no reason. You've been one of my besties for as long as I can remember, Kenny. Not once have I or any other of the guys thought you should change, and so if some stupid chick wants you to become less you in order to fulfill her 'goal relationship' then that's her business. She would need to work for it, and ask, and talk to you like an actual woman, instead of thinking she can just snap her fingers and her boyfriend will magically change into prince charming. All us boys are imperfect, and that's the way we like it!" Stan cheered, finishing his rally.

Kenny looked over at his friend in the bean bag. He couldn't help but smile. How he had friends in the first place was beyond him, but to have friends so caring instead of banter friends was incredible. Earlier today, as soon as he found out, Kyle ran across the cafeteria and hugged Kenny, telling him he deserved better and how he was there for him, and Cartman, well he was nice too, in his own Cartman way. He denies it, but when Kenny opened his bag, he found a packed lunch, and while Cartman denies it, only one kid in high school has bagged lunches with a message from their mother. Stan agreed for the first time since he and Wendy broke up to come out and to go to Kenny's house to smoke weed and talk about random shit, which led him to this realisation

He had it pretty good. He still hurt inside, but he knew, with friends like he has, he'd be healed in no time.


End file.
